Today will see me up my dose to 2mg Estradiol today, which is the level I’ll stay at until I decide it’s time to take another step in my gender journey.
In the past week I’ve had the occasional testicular ache and there is an area on the inside of my left breast that’s also felt a bit tender at times. But these sensations haven’t lasted long, maybe a minute or so at the most. At night, lying quietly, I think can feel a very, very light sensations around my nipples, but that may be wishful thinking more than anything.
On the mental front, other than a couple of down days, which I think were tied to not getting enough exercise because I was sick, I’ve been in a really good mood in general. At this point, it could still be a psycho-somatic lift due to actualizing a long-held desire vs. the hormones, but I’ll take it no matter it’s origin!
Of note is an increasing desire to develop breasts. My goal for starting HRT was to treat my mind, not adjust by body, but I’m finding that goal starting to shift. I’m noticing that I’m thinking more and more about having my body fit better into some of the clothes I own. Some of this might be that the sun came out this past week here in Seattle and it caused a shift in clothing that other women were wearing, and this filled me with a deeper sense of longing to fit into that crowd.
Still, it’s surprised me, as I know that my wife will leave me if I grow breasts, so something deep is driving these thoughts/feelings.