Last week’s dose: 2mg/day estradiol.
I’m fence-sitting about upping my dose to 3mg/day like I was planning four weeks ago. I really like the thought of it and how it might help accelerate the physical changes, but then the realization of the ramifications of that bounce into my head and I get kinda freaked out.
I’ll see how I feel in the morning and go from there. It’s the ultimate litmus test for me anyway: take the pills or not? I get to make that choice every day.
Physical: No notable changes since last week excepting there is now discernible tissue growth behind the nipples.
Mental: It’s been an up/down week in a lot of ways, mostly driven by close and extended family events. I lost my temper a couple of times with the kids in the past week in the evenings while trying to get them to bed. I felt terrible afterwards. I have noticed that my temper in general is much cooler, and that when it does erupt, it is for a much shorter time than before.
Still feeling pretty even keel overall though, excepting when I’m at my job, which is entering a huge, ambiguous planning cycle. I’m stuck in the crosscurrents of wanting to quit my job, but not being able to right away, and seeing the job I’m doing being reduced dramatically in scope and responsibility due to organizational shifts outside of my control.
I did have a few, very transient feelings of depression that crept in, but they quickly left of their own accord. I think they came from feeling the weight of all the things going on in my life that are up in the air in one way or another. That, and I haven’t been exercising as much as I would like to an inflamed knee that’s prevented me from running.