Lamentable

Fetid weight
Burdened toil
Sloughs away
Lifetime’s release
Dripping sticky
Filthy dirty
Disgusting
Revolting
Hideous
Ugly

Now alone
With your
Bared teeth
Ripping through
Gentle caresses
And angry
Joy-smearing support
I exist
Unwanted, untouchable
I am
Shadow wraith
Past reminder
Future destroyer
For want
Of life
Self-denied
So long
So so
Long

Your problem
Not mine
Leave my
Draught breaths
After drowning
Exhaling ash
In keening remorse
For surfacing
Cleansing myself
Being seen
Growing new
Unwanted flesh
That disturbs
You so
Your rejection
I accept
Your contempt
Is yours
To keep

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About cistotrans

A Seattle-area trans woman seeking a happy spot to stay at along the path of transition.
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