Transition Experiences: Managed to deadname myself twice this past week, once on the phone and another when introducing myself to someone I hadn’t met before. Whoops! Both times made me laugh.
Other than that, there isn’t much happening on the transition front other than I’m living the mundane life of trying to figure out what to wear to work in the morning and just being myself.
Emotional: I’ve been struggling with all sorts of negative emotions most of the week as I try to untangle the past few months. I vacillate between anger and depression about where I’m at again in life: on pause in some ways, and most of it is my own damn fault.
The good news (and there is some buried in my angst) is that I’m trying to set up some big changes in my life. Moving through full transition unblocked me on a few things that I’m now free to pursue since I’m not living the weird double life I was previously.
I have more of a vague outline than a full plan, but it’s something and I’m hanging on to it for dear life right now, because it’s what I got.
Physical: I am eating all the food again.
Weight: 180 lbs.
Dose: 7 mg/day estradiol via tablets, split into AM/PM doses of 4mg/3mg.
[Looking for detailed information about male to female hormone replacement therapy dosing and effects? Read my Brief Overview of Feminizing Hormones post. You might also be interested in The Trans Woman’s Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) Tracking Chart I created.]