Happy Birthday, Few

Few took our kids to a Mariners game tonight along with her sister, Fesil, and friends to celebrate her birthday. I’m happy the kids are able to spend some time with their mother on her birthday. I’d asked her a week ago if she wanted to do something with the kids and she was noncommittal, and then her sister bought tickets for the game.

Few texted me after the fact and asked if I wanted to go while pointing out that Fesil didn’t buy me a ticket. I never really expected to spend time with Few today so her offer was a kind one, but that her sister didn’t buy a ticket for me spoke volumes and I told her the decision was up to her and that my feelings wouldn’t be hurt if she didn’t want me to go. She never responded on that topic and then finally just today she texted me to let me know when she’d pick up the kids.

While I’m not hurt that she didn’t want me to go, I do feel somewhat hurt that she didn’t just tell me she only wanted to spend time with the kids. I think her non-engagement on this simple thing is just emblematic of how she didn’t communicate during the disintegration our relationship over the past few years: by not engaging on an awkward or uncomfortable topic.

This isn’t a big deal, but it’s one of those twinges that an old relationship can still bring, and it’s a good reminder to me that I need a good communicator in a partner.


About cistotrans

A Seattle-area trans woman seeking a happy spot to stay at along the path of transition.
This entry was posted in divorce, family, personal history and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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