Author Archives: cistotrans

About cistotrans

A Seattle-area trans woman seeking a happy spot to stay at along the path of transition.

April Fools’

1 April again. My second transition anniversary passed less eventfully than the first. I mowed the lawn with the push mower and cut down a dying spruce and dead rhododendron. The day before I cut down two dead fir trees, … Continue reading

Posted in gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Changes

Things change. They change all the time. There–did you see it? Something just changed. I’ve changed a lot over the past few years and I’m still changing. Most of my changes were obvious. The clothes I wear. The shape of … Continue reading

Posted in divorce, family, gender transition, LGBT, relationships, transgender | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Similarities between used Porsches and trans women’s bodies

Cost upwards of tens of thousands of dollars Needs tender, loving care to stay in top condition Are desired by men Sometimes end up wrapped around poles Simultaneously provokes anger and instills desire in some people Relatively rare due to … Continue reading

Posted in community, gender transition, humor, LGBT, transgender, transition, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Happiness, the now, and the opportunity cost of time

Content warning: suicide Opportunity cost The loss of other alternatives when one alternative is chosen. – Oxford Dictionaries Being trans put me into a state of suspended time for years. I did many things that pushed me out of the … Continue reading

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Just keep smiling

I have these days, a year and a half after transition, where I feel like a fraud. — ‘Do you have a towel I can borrow?’ ‘Of course; I already put one in the bag for you.’ ‘Thank you!’ My … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, LGBT, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

OMG! (Deadname)!

One great thing about my new girlfriend is meeting her friends and expanding my social circle. My girlfriend’s best friend (GBF) lives in the Columbia City area of Seattle and we went down Friday night so I could meet GBF … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, friends, gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Meditations on belonging

Belonging is something I’m still working on. I still don’t know how being trans influences belonging. My first inkling I didn’t belong in a group was when I was around four years old. Most of my neighbors were girls and … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment