Category Archives: coming out

All the Feels

In the coming week, I’m having The Surgery and I have many intense feelings about it. Disbelief, fear, anticipation, relief, excitement, acceptance, and gratitude. Disbelief rides atop all. Am I really doing this? Is this really happening? Is this really … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, healthcare, LGBT, observations, personal history, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

Living Beyond Transition

I debated transition for years, writhing in emotional pain trying to answer questions that lay beyond the transition event horizon: would I be happier if I transitioned? Would the pains of transition be less than the pains of denial by … Continue reading

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The Transition Roller Coaster

My transition has been a roller coaster and I realized last night that the ride so far has been pretty darn close to the Gartner Hype Cycle, so I took a crack at visualizing it: Once I realized I was … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, HRT, observations, opinion, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Do Cis People See Gender Counselors?

Do Cis People See Gender Counselors? A trans man friend of mine is planning to come out to his extended family as part of a brief holiday visit over Christmas and he’s getting a case of the nerves. He lives … Continue reading

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The Decision

Titanic arcs of lightning erupt from the electrodes like they are trying to split space and time. Each crackling surge of power zipper zig-zags towards me, rending the air into a nitrogen and oxygen plasma soup. The bass roar here … Continue reading

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You Should Still Transition

Last year I wrote a post called You Should Transition. I believe that even with all the negative shit happening for trans people right now, you should still transition. Why? Because you’re suffering from gender dysphoria and it won’t get … Continue reading

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My Friend, Loneliness

Loneliness is a new companion on my journey. When the still air suffocates me in silence I recall its foul cousin, isolation, the whispering sadist and apex of an invisible ménage à trios I felt when coupled but not whole, … Continue reading

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The Empress’s New Clothes

I am a mirrored mosaic made of shiny and jagged edges, all narrow slivers of myself glued to my body after shattering who I used to be. I no longer reflect toward myself but away. Multitudes see what they see … Continue reading

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The Hungers of the Flesh

My flesh, greedy for touch, threatens to swallow itself in hunger. I imagine myself an ouroboros, ring-like and unbroken instead of the scattered drops of quicksilver I am, with only surface tension to hold my pieces together and being ever-fearful … Continue reading

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Blooming Anew

There is pain within the truth as it hurtles into me. It bears the hurt of ruthless honestly like a broadside blade smacking skin, stinging. It was witness to my labors and cannot lie. The water from the shower is … Continue reading

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