Category Archives: personal history

Pushy Deadnaming

‘What was your name then?’ If you’ve changed your name, this question pops up now and again. I deflected. ‘That isn’t relevant.’ It isn’t in my trans job description to educate every person who asks me an inappropriate question about … Continue reading

Posted in counseling, gender transition, LGBT, mental health, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

What I tell myself when I’m having a bad moment

What I tell myself when I’m having a bad moment: Step back from the ledge. This broader world <waves hands> can really suck, but what about your internal world? Look how far you’ve come. You are Heather. You made it; … Continue reading

Posted in gender transition, mental health, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments

Which mom is your biological mom?

‘Which mom is your biological mom?’ The question hung in the air from one of my kids’ friends to my kid, who hesitated before answering. We were at a local restaurant to celebrate my kid’s birthday. I was sitting in … Continue reading

Posted in family, gender transition, LGBT, personal history, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

April Fools’

1 April again. My second transition anniversary passed less eventfully than the first. I mowed the lawn with the push mower and cut down a dying spruce and dead rhododendron. The day before I cut down two dead fir trees, … Continue reading

Posted in gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Happiness, the now, and the opportunity cost of time

Content warning: suicide Opportunity cost The loss of other alternatives when one alternative is chosen. – Oxford Dictionaries Being trans put me into a state of suspended time for years. I did many things that pushed me out of the … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Just keep smiling

I have these days, a year and a half after transition, where I feel like a fraud. — ‘Do you have a towel I can borrow?’ ‘Of course; I already put one in the bag for you.’ ‘Thank you!’ My … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, gender transition, LGBT, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

OMG! (Deadname)!

One great thing about my new girlfriend is meeting her friends and expanding my social circle. My girlfriend’s best friend (GBF) lives in the Columbia City area of Seattle and we went down Friday night so I could meet GBF … Continue reading

Posted in coming out, friends, gender transition, LGBT, observations, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments