Category Archives: self-acceptance

The Work of Being Trans

Being trans is work, no matter where you are in your transition journey. Pre-transition, I spent vast amounts of energy attempting to compartmentalize away being trans and when that became impossible, juggling my inner and outer lives while going to … Continue reading

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The Land Mine of Body Dysphoria

Body dysphoria, like gender dysphoria, is a weird thing. There are days, weeks, months even that pass by without me noticing it. I move through the world and just am. I might have passing thoughts of, ‘I should lose weight,’ … Continue reading

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My Friend, Loneliness

Loneliness is a new companion on my journey. When the still air suffocates me in silence I recall its foul cousin, isolation, the whispering sadist and apex of an invisible ménage à trios I felt when coupled but not whole, … Continue reading

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The Empress’s New Clothes

I am a mirrored mosaic made of shiny and jagged edges, all narrow slivers of myself glued to my body after shattering who I used to be. I no longer reflect toward myself but away. Multitudes see what they see … Continue reading

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The Hungers of the Flesh

My flesh, greedy for touch, threatens to swallow itself in hunger. I imagine myself an ouroboros, ring-like and unbroken instead of the scattered drops of quicksilver I am, with only surface tension to hold my pieces together and being ever-fearful … Continue reading

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Pushy Deadnaming

‘What was your name then?’ If you’ve changed your name, this question pops up now and again. I deflected. ‘That isn’t relevant.’ It isn’t in my trans job description to educate every person who asks me an inappropriate question about … Continue reading

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What I tell myself when I’m having a bad moment

What I tell myself when I’m having a bad moment: Step back from the ledge. This broader world <waves hands> can really suck, but what about your internal world? Look how far you’ve come. You are Heather. You made it; … Continue reading

Posted in gender transition, mental health, personal history, self-acceptance, transgender, transition | Tagged , , , , | 4 Comments